by Diane Glass
(for assholes only) Check all boxes that apply for your daily asshole count to see if you are dangerously close to pissing me off or getting me really excited.
Watched sports, any season will do Slammed doors in the face of feminists Passed gas whenever possible, then walked away to see other's reactions Burped loudly Scratched your crotch on a regular basis Cat called women on the street Responded to your name after the third query Had a beer in your hand Had a beer and a remote control in your hand Had a beer, a remote control and scratched your crotch Said, "Come on and let's go bitch," at least once Stationed yourself at the porno section and pointed and giggled Bought a porno magazine Condescended to a female about her ability in computing or math Spoke over a female or interrupted her Said, "Baby, I'm a Ferrari. Why would you want to date a Ford?" (yes, I've heard this) Yelled, "YOWZA" when a bikini clad woman crosses the TV set while with your date Said, "I'm like a wild stallion." (Yes, I've heard this before as well) Said the word "TITS" when referring to women's breasts. Asked what foreplay was Had sex for 10 minutes Killed a bug or aimed your car for a bird or squirrel Thought that you couldn't say anything because women will get on your case Ate at Hooters (for the food) or read Playboy (for the articles) Said anything at all Did anything at all Called a woman an uptight bitch Asshole Evaluation:
